The Blessing of Honesty: Teaching Children to Value Truth
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[00:00:00] Hi, everyone. It's Katy here today. We're talking about honesty because it's one of the most essential values that we can teach to our Children. It's something we can all appreciate because it has the power to build trust and strengthen relationships. It can shape character and align us further with the truth of God's word.
It's a commitment to living genuinely and authentically in our lives. Children, though, can sometimes have a tough time mastering the concept at a young age, because our human inclination is often to take the path of least resistance. Sometimes, rather than admit they made a mistake, it can feel easier to stay silent or even blame someone else.
My four year old son just this week shared a very long and compelling story about how the kittens and the dog must have worked together to put the toilet seat up because, of course, it wasn't him. Honesty is fundamental in our lives as followers of Christ. It's often helpful to [00:01:00] see honesty as a way of life rather than simply avoiding lies.
Teaching our kids to be honest is so important, especially today when they're often faced with a culture that tends to intentionally blur the lines between true and false as often as possible. As a Christian parent, your goal is to help them understand why being truthful matters and also how it can shape their entire lives in a more positive way.
The Bible places a strong emphasis on being truthful as well. Consider how Proverbs 12, 22 points out, The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy. This scripture doesn't just tell us that God dislikes lies. It shows us that living truthfully makes us a joy to our Lord.
Ephesians 4 25 teaches us, therefore, each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor. For we are all members of one body by teaching our children honesty. We're [00:02:00] setting them on a path where their actions and their hearts can reflect the honesty and integrity of Jesus and their character can be pleasing to him.
We are instilling in them a worldview that values transparency and trustworthiness. This foundational truth will impact how they relate to others, who they welcome into their circle of influence, how they face challenges in the world, and ultimately how they view themselves and their place in this world.
One of the most significant benefits of honesty is trust. Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship, whether it's between family members, friends, or even classmates. When children learn that being honest strengthens relationships, they start to see it in a new light. An honest home is a place where everyone can feel secure, loved, and valued for who they are and be comfortable admitting their faults.
This security plays a crucial role [00:03:00] as our children grow and learn to navigate the world inside and outside of our homes. So, sometimes my four year old son, when he's encouraged to tell the truth, he'll sigh and he'll say dramatically, Okay, I'll tell you, once he's prompted to, you know, give the truth, which is sometimes boring, um, especially compared to his very compelling and sometimes entertaining stories.
At this stage, I assume his intent is led by an appreciation for theatrics, And a bit of boredom towards the sometimes uninteresting truth rather than any type of genuine desire to deceive. The heart behind the action matters, of course, but we can also use these moments, even with very young Children as teaching opportunities of the values that we want to instill in our Children.
So understand that you may need to remind them how important honesty is [00:04:00] regularly. especially when they're young. When they're older, we can remind them that no matter what they've done, being dishonest is worse than that. Make sure to create a safe environment where they don't fear being truthful. So yes, while there may still be fair consequences for their actions, their honesty and integrity is both appreciated and recognized.
Teaching Children the Value of Honesty requires creating an environment where truthfulness is lived and valued daily. It starts at home, and it most certainly starts with us. So here are some ways to encourage honesty in your children. First, be a role model. Your children watch you even more closely than you may ever realize.
If they see you being truthful, even when it's hard or could have consequences, they'll learn the importance of truth in real life situations. What they see you do carries more weight than what they hear you say. When you make a mistake, admit it openly. [00:05:00] Show your children how to take responsibility and rectify the situation.
This transparency teaches them that integrity matters, even though it's not always easy. It also helps them understand that everyone, even grown ups, can make mistakes and handle them truthfully. So I want to talk to you a bit about a pet peeve of mine. You know the parents, please don't take this too personally if it's something that you've done, but you know the parents that tell their children, Oh, you're seven today.
to get meal discounts or theme park discounts. You just taught your child that if it benefits them, it's okay to lie. Now, how can you be upset with them if they lie to you because it benefits them to do so? You can't teach a value that you don't model. And sometimes this will mean taking a look in the mirror and realizing that we have some areas to improve as well.
You know how God often [00:06:00] gives us or allows us to walk through situations that are meant to shape our character? Like we ask for patience? And he gives us situations that push us and build our patients through those hard times that required our patients. We ask for strength or confidence and he gives us hard times that give us confidence in our ability to persevere and strength to face challenges in the future.
Maybe we ask for love, and he puts us through heartbreak so that we can realize at rock bottom that we had his love all along, and that's what we truly need to sustain us. Don't for a second think that this doesn't apply to the children he sends us to raise. If you're constantly hitting a wall with your child on something, it might be for a reason or a lesson that you're intended to learn through your parenting experience.
I don't necessarily mean if your child is lying a lot that you must be a liar and need to work on yourself. Actually, how I see this present most often is in less obvious [00:07:00] ways. So let's say lying is your biggest pet peeve in the world. And you cut people off instantly for showing the tiniest sign of deception without making any effort to understand the heart behind it.
Now you're raising a child who continues to test their boundaries of honesty, and it's pushing you over the edge because despite their behavior in this area, you do love them unconditionally. So maybe the lesson that you needed to learn was grace. Maybe you needed a reminder that you can still love the person while hating their sin.
Maybe you needed to see that even someone you are shaping and molding with your teachings every day is still imperfect and human. Perhaps a lesson on judging, forgiveness, and grace was what you needed. Maybe you're super uptight and you've been given a free spirit to teach you not to hold on so tight to control, to give it to God and trust in him more.
That's kind of a side note, but it's still good information to know as we work [00:08:00] towards raising our children well and giving them the best version of ourselves. It can really help to look at challenges as, what is this trying to teach me? Or what is this able to teach me? So next to encourage honesty in your Children is to celebrate their truth telling.
It's important to actively acknowledge and praise your child when they choose honesty, especially in situations where telling the truth may have been challenging. This positive reinforcement can have a significant influence on their future behavior. When Children are recognized for being truthful, they understand that honesty is not only the right choice.
But it's also appreciated and valued by those that they look up to. Next is encouraging open communication. Make sure that your children know they can talk to you about anything. When they feel safe, they're more likely to be honest. So we have to avoid overreacting if the truth is something they don't know.
Or even if the truth is something that's hard to hear. Instead, we can thank them for their [00:09:00] honesty, and we can discuss the issue calmly, even if we need to pause and come back to it later. When children share their experiences and challenges, listen without immediate judgment or criticism. Show appreciation for their honesty, even if the content is uncomfortable or disappointing.
This reassurance builds their confidence and reinforces that being truthful doesn't lead to love being withdrawn. It teaches them that honesty is the foundation of trust and security in relationships. Next, teach about consequences. While it's important to always encourage honesty, it's also important to discuss the consequences of dishonesty.
We need to go beyond simply saying that lying is bad and explore real life implications that help your children understand what can happen as a result of lying, in addition to teaching the benefits of being honest. Use real life examples where appropriate or discuss hypothetical situations to illustrate those [00:10:00] outcomes.
Discuss how dishonesty can damage relationships, erode trust, and lead to a cycle of lies where one has to be told to cover another. You can use biblical stories and examples from your own experiences to help illustrate these points. These discussions can help our children understand the serious moral and spiritual ramifications of dishonest behavior.
Also, books and stories are great tools for illustrating lessons. They can show, rather than just tell, the consequences of lies and the rewards of being truthful. Stories with characters who face moral dilemmas about lying or telling the truth can be so impactful. Because these narratives provide a safe space for children to explore.
Explore the consequences of dishonesty and the benefits of integrity without any personal risk. So after reading stories like this, engage your children in discussions about what they would do in similar situations and why honesty [00:11:00] matters. This not only helps solidify the value of honesty, but it also improves their empathy and decision making skills.
My new Christian children's book, Happy Are the People, does this so well and opens the door for a great conversation about truth in a way that kids can understand and enjoy. So by incorporating this book into your family's reading routine, you're providing your children with a tool that supports the lessons you're teaching them about honesty and more every day.
It's my hope that this will not only entertain your children, but also help them appreciate the value of being truthful in a way that resonates with their everyday experiences. So I'll link that for you. Now, let's talk about how honesty shapes lives. It does a lot more than just keep us out of trouble.
It truly shapes our lives and influences our relationships and our inner character. Let's take a closer look at how honesty impacts various aspects of life. Especially for Children who are growing in [00:12:00] their faith and growing in their social environments, building trustworthy relationships. When we're honest, we lay a strong foundation for trust.
This trust is essential in forming relationships that will be deep and long lasting. When children learn that their honesty earns them trust and respect, they feel more secure and valued. And this encourages them to continue being honest, which strengthens their relationships even further. Over time, they become known as reliable and trustworthy people, which are qualities that are highly valued in all areas of life, and will serve them well for the entire rest of their lives.
Honesty is also a key component of moral integrity, which is essentially the practice of consistently aligning your actions with your values. For children, learning to live honestly helps them develop a clear sense of right and wrong early on. Each honest action reinforces their identity as individuals who choose to do the [00:13:00] right thing, even when it may be hard.
This integrity brings them peace and self respect, because they'll know that they're living true to their values. This consistency between belief and behavior not only guides them through childhood, but also shapes them into adults who can navigate life with moral clarity. Honesty is also an important aspect of our spiritual development.
This supports a genuine relationship with God, where children learn to communicate with him openly and honestly. In prayer, They learn to express their true feelings, their true doubts and fears without having to hide behind pretences or perfectionism. This open line of communication with God encourages them to reflect on their own lives in light of the truth.
As they grow, their honest relationship with God becomes a source of strength and comfort for them that will guide them in all of their decisions and interaction. Children who practice honesty also grow into adults who don't have to [00:14:00] hide from the truth. This bravery will help them face life and its challenges far more effectively because they're used to dealing with things as they are, not as they wish they could be.
Also, when kids choose honesty, they develop a healthy sense of pride and self respect. They know they're doing the right thing, which is rewarding in itself, even if there's no other reward. This and the reputation they build as being trustworthy individuals in a world where this is such a rare quality will build their inner strength and confidence.
So to recap, five ways to encourage honesty in your children is to be a role model, celebrate truth telling, and Encourage open communication, teach about consequences, and use stories to teach. And five ways that honesty impacts various areas of life are building trustworthy relationships, strengthening moral integrity, fostering spiritual growth, [00:15:00] facing challenges boldly, and developing self respect.
By instilling in children a worldview that treasures honesty, we're equipping them with a key to navigating life and seeing the world not only as it is, but also as it could be a place where integrity guides actions and decisions. This way of living influences everything from relationships to self image to their spiritual life and sets them on a path towards a fulfilling and God honoring life.
I hope this discussion on honesty has given you useful insights. and practical ways to foster this quality in your Children. So let's commit to being diligent in this task together, ensuring that our Children truly understand the strength found in living truthfully. Next week, we'll explore the virtue of kindness and discover how we can help our Children become more empathetic and caring individuals.
I hope this episode was valuable for you, and I pray you're walking away [00:16:00] with a new insight, perspective, or idea to implement as you move forward. Remember that God makes everything we truly need available to us. And the life you've prayed for is just waiting for you to take the next step If you enjoy this podcast Please subscribe and leave us a review so that we can continue showing up and reaching families who need this message Until next time take care and stay blessed.
Thanks for listening
