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Effective Communication Skills to Your Child, parent-child communication

How to Teach Effective Communication Skills to Your Child

biblical principles communication parent-child relationship Jul 20, 2024

The Power of Effective Communication

Another day, another monosyllabic answer to your excited, "How was your day?" 😩

Or worse, your child is struggling or lashing out because they haven't learned how to express their feelings in healthy ways. Sound familiar?

These scenarios are daily reminders of the value of your children having effective communication skills as they navigate life. In today's fast-paced world, these skills are more crucial than ever for supporting healthy relationships and emotional well-being.

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Identify Key Communication Skills to Teach

Before you start teaching the skills, you'll need to identify which communication skills are most beneficial for your child to learn. This may depend on your strengths, their strengths, their personality, and even their current season of life.

Here are some key communication skills that can benefit your child:

  • Active Listening
  • Empathy
  • Expressive Communication
  • Reflective Listening
  • Role-Playing
  • Conflict Resolution
  • Non-Verbal Communication

Each of these skills plays a significant role in developing your child's ability to communicate effectively. Let's explore each one in a bit more detail so you can determine where you'd like to start.

Active Listening

Active listening is fully engaging with the speaker, showing interest, and providing feedback. It's more than just hearing words; it's about understanding the message being conveyed. I like to say this is listening with your whole body, rather than just your ears.

Here's how you can teach your child active listening:

  1. Model the Behavior: Show your child what active listening looks like by holding yourself accountable to showing up this way in your daily interactions. Maintain eye contact, nod, and respond appropriately during conversations to show you are understanding, engaged, and following along with the conversation.
  2. Practice Together: Have regular "listening sessions" where you take turns speaking and listening. Encourage your child to ask questions and reflect on what they've heard. These can be very real conversations where you have the added benefit of strengthening your parent-child bond as you strengthen this essential communication skill.
  3. Use Visual Cues: For younger children, visual aids like listening charts can be really helpful with understanding the concept of active listening. You can make this at home or utilize something like this Active Listening Bulletin Board I found on Amazon.

Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. This goes a step further beyond sympathy because it involves fully understanding a situation from the perspective of another. Teaching empathy helps children build stronger relationships and builds a valuable sense of compassion.

Here are some strategies for teaching your child empathy:

  1. Share Stories: Use books or personal stories to illustrate empathetic behavior. With nearly any children's book, you can practice discussing characters' feelings and why they might feel that way. 
  2. Role-Playing: Act out scenarios where your child has to put themselves in someone else's shoes. Discuss how they might feel and react in different situations. 
  3. Perspective-Taking: It's important to have them practice understanding someone else's feelings about a situation, even if they wouldn't have had those same feelings themselves. This allows them to learn their perspective isn't the only perspective. This helps them understand different viewpoints.

Expressive Communication

Expressive communication involves clearly articulating thoughts and feelings. This is essential for resolving conflicts and expressing needs, and it relies on using words and body language in ways that complement one another to effectively express the message you would like to convey.

Here's how to foster expressive communication in your children:

  1. Encourage "I" Statements: Teach your child to express their feelings using "I" statements, such as "I feel sad when..." This helps them take ownership of their emotions without blaming others. Instead of "You are making me so angry," you would encourage your child to say, "I am feeling angry." One of my favorite quotes is, "You are responsible for how you act, no matter how you feel", which requires taking ownership of our own feelings. "I" statements are extremely helpful in this goal.
  2. Practice Open-Ended Questions: Encourage your child to ask and answer open-ended questions to promote deeper, more authentic conversations and help them articulate their thoughts better. Instead of "How was your day?" Which can be answered "good" or "not so good", ask a question that encourages more depth, such as "Can you share something good about your day and how that made you feel?" 
  3. Provide Feedback: Offer positive feedback when your child communicates well. Praise their efforts and gently correct any missteps with constructive feedback.

Reflective Listening

Reflective listening involves repeating back what someone has said to ensure that you understood the message they were aiming to convey. This is a powerful tool for improving communication and building trust. For example, you may say, "I don't want to go to practice today," and your child may think that means you aren't going, when in reality, it just meant that you didn't want to. This skill clears up misunderstandings by ensuring clarity and comprehension by putting something in your own words to confirm understanding.

Here's how to teach your child reflective listening:

  1. Demonstrate the Technique: Show your child how to reflect back what they've heard, in their own words, to ensure clarity and understanding.
  2. Practice Regularly: Incorporate reflective listening into daily conversations. Encourage your child to use it during family discussions as well.
  3. Provide Encouragement: Praise your child when they use reflective listening effectively. Highlight the benefits of this skill in improving communication.

Conflict Resolution

Conflict resolution is essential for managing disagreements and maintaining healthy relationships. It's very unlikely you'll be lucky enough to avoid all forms of conflict in your family. The key is learning how to resolve situations peacefully, with relationships intact.

Here's how you can teach your child to resolve conflicts:

  1. Teach Problem-Solving Skills: Show your child how to identify the problem, brainstorm solutions, and choose the best course of action.
  2. Encourage Calm Discussions: Teach your child to stay calm during disagreements and to express their feelings without raising their voice or placing blame.
  3. Model Conflict Resolution: Demonstrate how to resolve conflicts peacefully in your interactions. Let your child see you negotiating, expressing yourself clearly, and finding compromises.

Non-Verbal Communication

Non-verbal communication, such as body language and facial expressions, is a vital part of effective communication. You can say a lot, even without saying a single word.

Here’s how to teach non-verbal communication skills:

  1. Use Visual Aids: Show pictures of different facial expressions and body postures. Discuss what emotions they might represent.
  2. Play Charades: Use games like charades to practice non-verbal communication. This helps your child understand the importance of body language and how effective it can be.
  3. Provide Feedback: When your child uses non-verbal communication effectively, provide positive feedback. Explain how their body language enhanced, or hindered, their message.

Top Tips for Teaching Communication Skills

  1. Be Consistent: Consistency is key in teaching communication skills. Regular practice and reinforcement will help your child develop these skills over time.
  2. Be Patient: Developing effective communication skills takes time. Be patient and provide ongoing support and encouragement.
  3. Create a Safe Environment: Ensure your child feels safe to express themselves without fear of judgment or criticism. This will encourage them to practice their communication skills more freely.
  4. Use Everyday Opportunities: Look for opportunities in daily life to practice communication skills. This can be during meals, car rides, or family activities.

 

Teaching your child effective communication skills is one of the best investments you can make in their future, and in your family. By modeling behavior, encouraging expressive communication, practicing reflective listening, using role-playing scenarios, reinforcing positive behaviors, and maintaining consistency, you'll help your child develop the skills they need to navigate life successfully.

Remember, every interaction is an opportunity to teach and reinforce these vital skills.

If you're interested in mastering the art of meaningful conversation and strengthening a deep emotional connection with your child, check out this special offer for 90% off the Advanced Parent-Child Communication Mastery Bundle. This masterclass is your gateway to becoming a confident communicator, capable of handling conflicts gracefully and creating a peaceful, loving environment. By embracing these strategies, you’ll build a legacy of love, trust, and understanding that strengthens your family for years to come. 

Children's Book Recommendations that can aid you in teaching effective communication skills:

 

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Author

Katy Bordeaux is a Certified Parenting & Family Coach and the founder of both Covenant Collections and Kingdom Purpose Moms. Passionate about guiding families to thrive, Katy combines biblical wisdom with practical parenting strategies to help parents build strong, faith-filled homes. Connect with her for more resources and support on your parenting journey.

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